Week 10- Wrap Up

This week we wrapped up our readings in Goddard’s book, “Drawing Heaven into Our Marriages,” and Gottman's book "The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work". I highly recommend that everyone married or not read those books, as they give valuable knowledge about being a better person and having better relationships. To me, one of the main reasons we are here on Earth are to grow and nurture family relationships and friend relationships as we are all part of God's family. 
In chapter eleven of Gottman’s book he talks about the concept of “gridlock”. A gridlock problem is when neither person can make any headway in getting the other to understand and respect their perspective, much less agree with it. This can be a common problem in most relationships and so it is important that we understand what it is and can solve it. Something I found comforting is that you do not have to solve the problem to get past gridlock. The goal to overcome gridlock is that you can and acknowledge and discuss the issue without hurting each other. You and your spouse are not identical people, and so you are not going to agree 100% on absolutely everything. Being able to discuss your opinions and viewpoints without hurting each other is essential. To me, that takes charity. When we see are spouse for who they are, a son or daughter of God, we will want to be kinder. We can pray for the gift of charity and feel more love to our spouse that will not condemn them or judge them harshly. We will be okay with the fact that we do not agree 100% on every problem, but that does not make our spouse a bad person nor make us a victim of a problem. 

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